The condemned stories became extremely real last weekend. I picked her up from work and noticed a change. Her level of anticipation was extremely annoying. She couldn't hold a conversation; the past five minutes kept repeating themselves. I tried to rationalize my thoughts, I went straight to denial. She has so much to stay sober for. Maybe she’s excited about getting her license back, visiting her children in Connecticut in a few weeks, getting off of probation… the list goes on. Sunday night was worse. It seemed as though her lower jaw wished to escape from the structure of her mouth. Her hips swayed as if music were playing. She always had a tendency to move her wrists when she spoke… but she wasn't talking.
I went to bed. The next morning I found myself in a horror movie. I found her body tense; tongue and lips swollen. She moaned in agony- and I left her there. I talked to one of our friends-she came over and another followed. Her bedroom was dark and still until we woke the beast. She glared at the three of us hovering around her bed. Her eyes were solid black; full of rage. Then tears poured when she hung up the phone with work.