Mar 19, 2014

       I can't wait to get out there again... It's been too long. I was reunited with my lap top almost a month ago and had been in and out of checking my site on MM- always disappointed. Photographers from LA area were still contacting me for future plans from last summer... where were the creatives in AZ!? Then I noticed I hadn't changed my location on my profile. OH. whoops. Sorry friends. I spent two days messaging my Cali photographers: setting up shoots for this summer out there and apologizing for my negligence to the photographers who wanted to "shoot tomorrow" in the desert.

     So I updated my profile: First day. Two jobs. First shoot in AZ.  Saturday.
       One of a few of my works, with Dan Dozer, displayed in an art gallery  in Santa Monica last month. Being in Arizona kept me from going to the opening. The showing went over very well for the photographer. I can't wait to work with Dan again. 

Mar 16, 2014

*Being sober doesn't mean being invincible. I would like to think the days of stitches, bruises and black eyes are over, but that would have to entail my life being over~ which is just now beginning. The difference in my new injuries is the feelings behind them. There is a lack of regret, shame and humiliation when trying to explain the new bruise or having to defend my boyfriend, "He would never hit me!".
            It is now turned inward to feelings of practical fear~ how am I going to be able to do this or that at work? My new job doesn't entail washing dishes or anything of that sort but having to 'take it easy' for a pinkie wound is quite absurd.
              Freedom from self. Laughing at the new not so exciting stories as they were before; like this new addition to my collage of pain~ I was sweeping my front porch!
Three stitches... Removed tomorrow. 

Mar 13, 2014


I pray that I may see signs of my growth in the new life.
I pray that I may always keep trying to grow.
Look familiar? 
But it's in Arizona.  

    It is difficult to fathom living in a whole other state when the scenery is exactly like my old home in Cali. I've been living out here for almost five months now and I still feel like this isn't real life... When am I going to wake up? 
       ~Someone pinch me!?
So, this is my new home. For how long I'm not sure. I'm still shooting/modeling while I'm away from Cali.  I'm finding some amazing places to shoot outside of the Prescott area. There are some great places to shoot in Prescott, yet not much privacy. This one is taken in Sedona. This is the most beautiful place I've seen with my own eyes. Now it's not just a fantasy to visit through a magazine.  

My parents came out from California last month and we drove up to NAU. He wanted me to see the college he went to, the college my nephew is going to attend and his hope of me finishing my schooling here.  
It is  a beautiful campus. 

I miss Cali!